"what did you say your name was?"
"I didn't . "
"oh...so, what's your name?"
"name's Cromelian Bablican"
"you what?"
"I said name is CROMELIAN BABLICAN"
"well, pleased to meet you mr Bablican. I'm nagu. You sound kind of familar."
"well, pleased to meet you too mr nagu. You look like a seasoned traveller yourself, i might say. It wouldn't be at all surprising if a man of your caliber, your distinction, has come across The Cromelian before , or at least one of his works of psychick confabulation and collateral damagic! "
"what?"
"Oh, a bit slow today, are we? "
"yeah, i shouldn't have smoked weed on top of the ketama gold this morning before getting out of bed.That stuff just tastes too good."
"well, not to worry; i am happy to elaborate on whatever it is that you didn't quite comprehend"
"can you run it past me again, the bit about your travels to Microamnesia?"
"Now listen here, don't you try to outpun me ya little nagger! I was spinning before you were even woven and i'll be weaving long after you've spun out! I started this game , and i'm the one who writes the rules. I 'm in charge of what goes down, what's cool i define, what's hip i refine ! "
"whatever you say mr Cocainian."
"Very Funny. So what else is there to expand on?"
"How about the fact that whatever we say appears on this komputer screen ? And that i am typing it? And that you are just a confabulation of yourself as programmed by The Nagual? Ha ha ha eat THAT , Cromelian you shitface!"
"I'll be back..."
"Ok mr nagu let's get serious , shall we? There's people reading this..."
"We hope. What shall we babble about mr Bablican? "
"Watch it. Drugs?"
"Yes please. What you got?"
"I meant shall we TALK about drugs?"
"What, and be armchair drug takers, talking without doing? All right, all right, i guess it boils down to drugs doesn't it?"
"I'm afraid it does. Control the drugs and you control the people, pretty much. Tobacco, alcohol, opium, coca, these things work and people want them badly. Unfortunately they come from plants and cannot be patented , so they must be controlled somehow. Opium and derivatives are extremely effective pain killers. Physical and emotional pain . When you're in a lot of pain, or in pain for a long time, all you want is for the pain to stop.You cannot really function if it doesn't, you're crippled. By restricting access to effective pain relief people are controlled very effectively. Coca gives strength and power to those who have it, and power is precious stuff. And so on. There is A LOT of money to be made from such a huge and forever expanding market, with customers guaranteed to come back for more. And of course, criminalising drugs increases the FuckUp Factor in society, and produces more meat for the grinder. Its not just war on drugs or on terror, its war on people. Don't you just love Amerika? "
"What about the plant teachers? They are a bit different aren't they? The situation seems more complex in this case. These aren't your everyday habit-forming medicines or companions and the demand for them on the global scale is much smaller and localised. The majority of the population in many places mistrusts them . It seems there is a much larger fear component involved in the case of these drugs, from every side. People really want to go there, deep down they know it's true, but are afraid to make that choice and so, to reaffirm themselves and avoid the fear or the feeling of lack, they must declare the experience illegitimate and those who stand for it fakes. They can't have people finding out stuff that they supposedly don't know, that would make us a threat somehow. Such are the burdens the human mind is still carrying from the past."
"Similarly , some of these hurt, heartless and small minded people cannot bare to think that others are experiencing love, light and ecstacy that they think they don't deserve themselves, and their jealousy turns them against those who they think are having too much of a good time"
"Poor sods, if they knew the other side of the story they'd be extremely happy to leave us nutters to it ...Yeah , that's "a good time" allright! "
"So what happened to you in there?"
"Oh , you know, generalised and specific metaphysical nastiness totally focused on poor old me. Your typical eternal immortal and invisible evil power sucking me dry. My sister felt it remotely in her sleep, thousands of miles away , that something Very Bad had happened to me, probably in connection to my interests in esobotany. The Bad Guys came and got me. Guess what, turns out i had summoned them as well. You live and learn eh? In fact i did live and learn a lot from it. A proper cleanse. Results are very positive. "
"That's nothing. I was tricked by a masonic group that tried to trap my soul while i was tripping . I had to spend an eternity in Terror before i could get unstuck . It felt like my soul went through a very very excruciatingly slow blender. A FuckUp of cosmic propoportions. Or so it seemed at the time. "
"Yeah, we should start a group for traumatised neo-shamans, to help each other overcome and integrate the shock of initiation."
"With us as facilitators, of course."
"Who else?"
"And we should probably make it men-only."
"WHAT? No way, José! I want powerful and sweet neo-shamanesses to cuddle up with, not smelly, hairy guys! That could be a unique opportunity to find a woman that's worth it! "
"That's why i said we should make it men-only."
"... You're right. Who wants another neurotic new age bitch who thinks she's the Goddess incarnate, anyway? "
"They all are , that's the problem."
"What, neurotic bitches?"
"No, the Goddess incarnate."
"Yeah, and i'm Pan himself! I'd rather meet a neoerotic witch. Goddesses bore me. All they seem to want to do is compete with me, put me down, prove they're better somehow. Or make me jealous, put me to work, test me out. They're stuck in the same repetitive rut. Boring. "
"Just because you used a woman to hurt yourself doesn't mean its THEIR problem."
"Who asked you to be my freeking anal-yst? Get your head out of your anus , Cromelian! This new age style of duelling is also all so boring.
BORING. B O R I N G."
"OK nagu, don't bore. Seriously now though, with this mutual support group, business could be good. Talking of which, think how opportunistically propitious an international ban on ayahuasca would be! It would take them a while to get set up to detect or even recognise powdered ayahuasca herbs in mail packages. As soon as it's banned the demand will rise and it'll be worth at least 4 times as much as it is now!"
"10 times!"
"Yeah, we ought to look into stockpiling a load now, then make a killing when the ban comes!"
"Har har har! All RIGHT! Now we're talking! Have a cigar!"
[to be continued]
